Red Dead Irritation

[FullAuto]

I've played this game a fair bit, and only now do I realise just how much it irritates me.

 

*The aiming. Why put aim and shoot on the two clumsiest buttons on a PS3 pad, L2 and R2? Buttons so mushy they're practically peas.

 

*The controls. Why are they so clumsy? Is there a game design law that states the bigger the game area is, the clumsier your controls must be? I'm talking about simple movement, here, nothing fancy.

 

*The total lack of effect your decisions have. Wipe out a town? Wait a little while and it will respawn. This, in an open world game. I go back how many years to something like Fallout, I can do that. In modern games, I can't. Why don't the developers want me to have control over how I play?

 

*The animal respawn system. I'm not going to point out that the game is far too well-populated, I just want to say that you can get into a certain area, kill a few animals, skin them, and the area is just as well-populated. This is most obvious with wolves. You kill a wolf pack. You get up from skinning the last corpse, and there's another wolf pack coming at you. You can do this over and over again. The system is broken.

 

*You cannot ride a horse, maintain a constant speed, and aim and shoot without fingernimblery of the highest order. This is pure idiocy in a game where the vast majority of travel, and virtually all the chases, are on horseback. Hold L2 to aim. Tap X to keep your horse going fast (merely holding X, which according to the instructions, keeps your horse's speed constant, does not work, your horse slows to a canter. Trot? Who knows). Steer with the left stick. Move your aim point with the right stick. Shoot with R2. Hideous.

 

*The game area is rather large. Yet your default speed is a walk. Your run, holding down X, is actually a gentle jog. Your sprint, by tapping X, is a modest run.

 

*Please explain to me why I cannot move, look, and change weapon at the same time. You have a pad that has 12 buttons, a D-pad, and two analog sticks. I can design a control system that lets you do that. I'm not even a game designer.

 

*The horse physics. Forgiving to the point of stupidity. No, you should not fall off from every little bump, but nor should your horse be able to run full tilt into a building/fence/rock and simply come to a halt, unharmed, with you still in the saddle. I understand riding a horse across rough ground means falling off a lot. Players who find it irritating will do stuff like stick to roads and tracks.

 

*Direction-finding. Big, wide open spaces. While I'm sure I lag behind the vast majority of players who have televisions the size of doors and surround sound set ups that make Dolby cut themselves, I do not. Hence, I have difficulty determining which of the three-hundred-and-sixty degrees gunshots/screams/barks are coming from. A little visual indication would be smashing, thanks.

 

*The skinning animation. Once you've seen this ten times (it's not graphic or anything, just boring), it's too much. When you consider that over the course of the game you may hunt hundreds of animals, it is hours of your life wasted. Why is it not skippable, O Lord?

 

*After re-watching Watership Down recently, I can no longer shoot the rabbits. This one is my fault, but still. Briiiight eyes, burning like fyyyaaahhhh...

 

*Morality. Pointless, as playing it evil or good changes bugger-all, you still follow the same route through the game.

 

*The Red Eye aiming. You introduce a slow-mo bullet time mechanic that begins with a blinding flash. I think we can all see the turd on that lawn.

 

The graphics and sound are good, the voice acting and script are okay (Christ, that must have pained some people, to actually pay for quality), they've got the feel of the Old West right, it's just the silly ineffectuality of the gameplay and dodgy design decisions. I'm halfway through the story, but I'm now so annoyed I don't think I can bear to finish it.

[Sunflash]

Lol console shooters.

 

That's all I have to say on that.

[Pete]

Lol console shooters.

 

That's all I have to say on that.

 

Indeed - L4D2 on the X-Box is a bit painful, Because the zombies come at you from all sides and you can't turn around quick enough they had to have a button on the controller that rotates your character 180 degrees instantly. It doesn't help much, and I can kill more zombies on the same difficulty on a PC than I can on the X-Box.

 

It's not that it takes time to get used to the controller - that's a given, but it's just plain easier and more enjopyable on the PC.

 

Okay, I'll stop hijacking now.

[Space Voyager]

Lol console shooters.

 

That's all I have to say on that.

THAT! PC, PC, PC!!!

[Bomb Bloke]

While I'll agree that the PC is a better platform for "serious" FPS gamers, that doesn't mean console shooters should be "hard" to play. The only real difference is that the consoles (usually) don't support a mouse. The only things a mouse is good for are quick direction changes and fast precision aiming.

 

Of course, developers could just crank the sensitivity of the analog sticks over nine thousand, but it'd still be easier to use a mouse.

 

On the other hand, controllers beat keyboards any day.

[Pete]

Controllers beat keyboards unless you're playing a strategy game on a console

[Bomb Bloke]

Oy, we're talking about FPS here - strategy games on consoles are about as practical as text editors.

 

Driving games are another thing consoles are good at; just about all the buttons these days are analog (not just the obvious looking triggers sported by the likes of the Xbox), which is great for maintaining a certain level of acceleration/brakes.

[Matri]

Yeah, no.

 

Watching my console-only cousin play SW Battlefront on my PC.

 

His point-blank circle-strafing strategy was sound. Still couldn't hit the giant droid with the huge hitbox at that range.

 

It was painful to watch.

[FullAuto]

Basically echoing BB's point here. It's not that RDR is an FPS, it's not. It's got plenty of shooting in, but the set up is tweakable to a state of proficiency, if not the excellence you can get out of a mouse/Wiimote. The shooting itself is not the problem. It's the silly controls and design decisions, and these are hardly confined to console games.

 

I can find more leeway in my heart for PC games, because mouse and keyboard, AFAIK, were not made with gaming first in mind. That's not an excuse you can use with a a console's pad. Designed solely for gaming, with very few permutations when it comes to the number of control schemes, and yet bullshit still happens. I know they pay people to playtest games! Are they shy, or what?

[Matri]

...I know they pay people to playtest games!

Have you played any recent games? I'm finding it hard to believe they did any testing.

 

That's like saying they tested the Titanic for leaks before launching. And we know how that went.

[Bomb Bloke]

Then there's Metroid Prime III, a console-only FPS that one reviewer marked down because the controls were too good...

 

Though being on the Wii, that's a bit of a special case.

[FullAuto]

Now that Undead Nightmare has been released, all is forgiven.

 

Well, not quite, but I'm willing to overlook a lot to shoot zombies. Normally, in RDR, the temptation to ride into town and shoot the place up, killing everyone there, was sometimes too much to resist, and so a shootout would ensue, with whores, sheriffs, deputies, gang members, shopkeepers, cowboys, clerks, wives and everyone else getting shot. This would inevitably end with a massive posse riding into town when I was out of ammo and shooting me down in the street like a dog after I carried out the West's biggest mass murder.

 

Now, I can ride into towns and shoot everyone and it's encouraged because they're undead! Ace! Lots of low porches and flat rooves, water towers and barns with nice high platforms and ladders, oh my yes. Loving it more than the main game.

[FullAuto]

Forgive my trespasses, O Lord.

 

* Left my horse waiting on a train track, while I went to skin a bear. Train went past. I looked around for my horse. Whoops.

 

* Called in to rescue a woman about to be lynched. Tried shooting the rope she was hanging by, missed, hit her husband in the head.

 

* Tried rescuing a whore from being stabbed. Shot the knife out of the dastardly brigand's hand. He drew his revolver. I shot that out of his hand. His five best mates come out of the nearest saloon and start shooting me. The moral of the story, I suppose, is: don't try and stop whores from getting stabbed?

 

* Bounty hunting. Dragged a chap back to town (part of the way, I'm not an animal) behind my horse. The marshals shot him to bits as he slid by. Guess I won't be collecting the live bounty fee, then.

 

* After I'd prevented someone being robbed (although they did get covered in the robber's brains) I shot the robber's horse, skinned it, and the victim promptly ran screaming to the law. I get a bounty on my head for killing a criminal's horse, but killing the criminal is okay?

 

* I rescued a man from a wolf pack and a bear. Yes, that's right. Not just a wolf pack, but a bear as well. Now, because it was a bit of a melee, with wolves swirling around and my horse rearing, some of my fire went a bit awry. And as I was using the Broom Of Death Which Sweeps All Before It (semi-automatic shotgun) some of that winged the chap in question. So, "Thanks for savin' mah life, mister!" and then off he goes to blab to the law. Approximately two millionths of a second later, the world's fastest posse turns up, and starts shooting. As I am fending off this new challenge, a bear comes along and claws me to death. I know life isn't fair, but Christ.

[Bomb Bloke]

Left my horse waiting on a train track, while I went to skin a bear. Train went past. I looked around for my horse. Whoops.

That's a brave horse, to stand its ground against an oncoming train. Real loyal.

 

I get a bounty on my head for killing a criminal's horse, but killing the criminal is okay?

What did that poor horse do to you?